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Exchanging two or three e-mails is a good way to get a sense of each other's personality.

"It gives a richer picture of who you are," he adds.

According to Ok Trends, the top three phrases in initial e-mails with the highest response rate are "you mention," "good taste" and "noticed that." So, describe something that resonated with you from his profile, advises Spira, but avoid physical compliments because "they seem too clichéd." And keep it brief: Ok Trends found that the ideal first message length is only 200 characters, or one minute's worth of typing for the average writer.

The shortest messages get the best response rate; the reply rate goes down as messages get longer.

This is likely because an initial message serves mostly to make your profile available to the other person.

The lesson: Spend time on your profile, and don't stress too much about your first e-mail! Be Direct When it comes to virtual dating, forget playing "hard to get." If someone you're interested in contacts you, it won't pay off to "casually" wait a few days to reply.

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